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The following episode written for The Xena Warrior Princess Virtual Season is a work of fiction based upon the television series Xena: Warrior Princess.

The original characters are used strictly for fan purposes and not for profit.

There is no intent to infringe upon or violate any copyrights held by Studio USA, Renaissance Pictures, Universal Television or any other organization that owns the rights to this series.


The script, story ideas, and any characters created by the authors that are not part of the original series are copyrighted and remain the sole property of those authors. Also, any original artworks are copyrighted and remain the sole property of those artists. Permission to use any of the written or drawn works herein must be submitted to the origin author(s) and artist(s).

 


Xena: Warrior Princess Virtual Season

Episode 721: Mayan Madness

Written by Heather Creely & Richard B.Kloosterboer

Illustrated by Nando, Gina, and Rich


 

DEDICATED TO KEVIN SMITH {ARES} 1963-2002 - YOU BEWDY

 

TEASER

1. EXT. SOUTH AMERICA - MARKET DAY, OLMEC VILLAGE - MORNING

Xena and Gabrielle are just passing through an Olmec village.

It is market day and people are displaying their wares.

Gabrielle samples a pepper and is surprised by the strong taste.

 

GABRIELLE
(gasping and fanning her mouth)

These people certainly like their food hot.

Xena takes a swig of 'Pisco', the local brew, hardly showing her surprise at the strong taste of the drink.

CUT TO:

A group of teens are playing an unusual game.

The game is the ancestor of basketball, except instead of dribbling, the players have to keep the ball off the ground and score by hitting the ball through their opponents hoop.

 

OLMEC PEOPLE
(chanting)

Ollama! Ollama!

 

GABRIELLE
(amused)

Must be the name of a player.

 

XENA
(bemused)

Must be...

 

Xena catches the ball, looks at it curiously and throws it through the hoop to the astonishment of the onlookers, who then cheer loudly.

 

XENA

Piece of cake.

 

CUT TO:

2.EXT. MARKET DAY, OLMEC VILLAGE - MORNING

Xena and Gabrielle continue to watch the game with fascination, trying to discern the rules and strategy involved.

Out of nowhere, soldiers barge through the crowd, one pushes Gabrielle roughly aside, surprising her.

 

SOLDIER 1

Out of the way, scum.

 

Xena blocks Soldier 1 giving him a menacing scowl.

oldier 1 avoids eye contact and joins the other dozen soldiers. The other soldiers pick up the teens roughly and drag them off.

An Olmec woman pleads with them to let her brother go to no avail.

Xena flips through the air landing in front the soldiers and teens.

XENA

ALALALALALALALALA -----------------SHEEYA!

 

She back-fists a soldier to get his attention.

He, in turn, releases the boy.

 

XENA
(stoic)

Let 'em go.

 

Gabrielle confronts Soldier 1 with sais drawn.

 

GABRIELLE

Better listen to her.

 

Two soldiers attack; Xena retaliates against the two with a double palm hit knocking them back.

They are stunned, but recover quickly.

Soldier 2, using his club, swings down but misses Xena.

She steps aside and uses a sidekick, which causes him to fly several meters, landing awkwardly on a stall.

Soldier 3 swings, but Xena’s block catches his arm. His momentum flips him over.

Pinning him by planting her foot in his ribs, Xena wrestles his club from his twisted arm and spins the club in figure eights, cackling with berserker glee.

 

XENA
(snidely)

Good balance.

 

Soldier 4 runs into Xena's right back-fist holding the club. She spins around, downing him with a reverse thrust kick to the midsection before the momentum of her spin lets the club knock him flat.

Soldier 2 is back and uses the club as a sword.

Xena's eyes gleam with excitement as she blocks his every move. She jabs him in the ribs hard before flattening him with an uppercut with the club, landing him in the middle of a stall.

 

XENA
(laughing)

Too easy.

 

Gabrielle blocks Soldier 1's thrusts with her sais and flips him over before winding him. She does a back thrust kick into Soldier 5, who flies back into three of his comrades.

The three soldiers recover quickly and attack at the same time.

Gabrielle takes a running leap with a side thrust kick and takes out Soldier 7 in the middle. She lands and turns around to meet Soldier 6 and Soldier 8 who waste no time in turning themselves around to face and attack Gabrielle by slashing down with their clubs.

Gabrielle uses her sais to protect and strengthen her forearms. She blocks both clubs and strains under the force, bending her knees for support - she springs back up forcing Soldier 6 and Soldier 8 to lose their balance.

Gabrielle uses this opportunity to wind them both hard at the same time - jumps up and does a high-split kick to their heads to knock them out.

Xena is soon at Gabrielle's side.

 

XENA

Not bad, two in one go.

 

GABRIELLE

I've got two up on you.

 

XENA

I must be getting old.

 

GABRIELLE

Don't put yourself down. I'm sure you'll get your kicks in.

 

Xena and Gabrielle stand back to back as the remaining four surround them.

They are quickly joined by six of the stunned eight.

 

XENA

Gabrielle, give me your arms.

 

GABRIELLE
(smiles cheekily)

Okay, I get it.

 

Gabrielle complies, and Xena starts turning Gabrielle around in a circular motion.

As the speed increases both Xena and Gabrielle are spinning together like a vertical propeller, kicking and running against the surprised soldiers knocking them out one by one.

Bringing the spinning to a halt, Xena gently releases Gabrielle's grasp, flips over and lands close to Soldier 1.

Xena applies the Pinch.

 

XENA

I just cut-off the flow of blood to your brain. You’ll be dead in thirty seconds unless you tell me where you were taking these kids and why.

 

SOLDIER 1
(gasp)

They have been chosen…

 

XENA

Chosen for what?

 

People stare and chat in hushed tones as they witness blood begin to trickle out of the soldier's nose.

 

SOLDIER 1

Chosen to play Pok-ta-pok…

(gasp)

...against the Mayan champions.

 

The Olmec woman whose brother was saved approaches Xena.

 

OLMEC WOMAN

What he won't tell you is that the losers always get sacrificed.

 

Xena releases the pinch on the soldier who then collapses.

Gabrielle is shocked at the revelation of sacrifices.

 

GABRIELLE
(angry)

That's barbaric.

 

The Olmec woman nods sadly.

 

OLMEC WOMAN

The Mayans always win regardless of what our team does in the game.

 

The woman starts weeping, and Gabrielle comforts her.

 

OLMEC WOMAN

It’s not only that I was going to lose my brother...

(beat)

but our race has lost so many strong, young men to this game of the Mayans.

 

GABRIELLE

What can we do to help?

 

The woman's eyes light up with hope.

Xena looks suspicious.

 

OLMEC WOMAN
(relieved)

I have a friend who can tell you more. Come with me.

CUT TO:

 

END TEASER

ACT I

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