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Welcome to the Official XWPVS Virtual Season 8.  We will present you with 22 episodes that I am sure you will enjoy.  We would also like to hear from you. You can write us at: theofficialxwpvs@hotmail.com

Now... On with the show.

The following episode written for the Xena Warrior Princess Virtual Season is a work of fiction based upon the television series Xena: Warrior Princess. The original characters are used strictly for fan purposes and NOT for profit. There is no intent to infringe upon or violate any copyrights held by Studio USA, Renaissance Pictures, Universal Television or any other organization that owns the rights to this series.

The script, story ideas, and any characters created by the authors that are not part of the original series are copyrighted and remain the sole property of those authors. Also, any original artworks are copyrighted and remain the sole property of those artists. Permission to use any of the written or drawn works herein must be submitted to the original author(s) and artist(s).



Xena Warrior Princess Virtual Season Episode

808: Foiled Plans

Teleplay by: Chris Schinella and Diane Taubold

Written by: Chris Schinella and Diane Taubold

Illustrated by: Gina

Teaser ad by: Blitzgal




Mel and Janice are sitting with Clive Thomas of British Intelligence in front of a bay window overlooking the slopes.

There are drinks in front of them.

Mel is quietly listening.

Janice is lighting a cigar and scrutinizing the man seated opposite her.


So, somethingís turned up missing in London...


Would you mind elaborating a little on that, and tell me what thatís got to do with us?



Well, as I was trying to tell you on the slopes, Doctor Covington, it has to do with the scrolls you and Miss Pappas discovered last year in Ireland.



One of them has shown up missing?



No, actually...


Well you see... it seems others were found recently, quite by accident... in England.


Mel and Janice exchange a questioning look.



The curator of the London Museum thinks the battling bard of Poteidea may have written them.


(sitting straight up)

Oh, my!



Unfortunately, as you both are the only known experts in...



Let me guess. He wants us to authenticate them.



Yes, exactly...


A tense silence falls between the three as Janice leans back in her seat and crosses her legs.

She stares Thomas in the eye.


(flicking ashes on the floor)

Tell me something, Mister Thomas... Do I look like I just fell off the banana boat?



I beg your pardon, Doctor Covington?


(leans forward - one brow arched high)

The British Museum isnít going to hire someone from British Intelligence to track us down just to tell us they need a few scrolls authenticated.


Especially after our disagreement regarding the translation from the book of Ptah. Iím sure that both the Brits, and the U.S. State department arenít exactly thrilled with us.


As a matter of fact, Iíd say itís safe to wager theyíd like nothing better than to see us shot for treason.


So, youíre either here to arrest us... OR something in those scrolls is a threat to national security.

(leans back in her seat)

So. Which is it?


Mel, eyes wide, looks from Janice to Thomas and back to Janice.

Janice sits coolly eyeing Thomas, who begins to fidget with the toothpick in the olive of his martini.

Mel turns to Thomas, arms folded in front of her chest.



Sheís absolutely right, sir.


Just exactly what is goiní on here!?


(clears his throat - smiles)

Yes... well... youíre quite right. Our governments were quite upset by the little escapade you ladies pulled with the translation from the book of Ptah.

(beat - leans in conspiratorially)

Youíre also quite right about this being a matter of national security.



HA! I thought as much!


She stamps her cigar out in the ashtray and roughly whispers just loud enough for him to hear...



Fat chance in hell, Thomas!


(leans back - appalled)

Doctor Covington... Doctor Pappas... Ladies, please ...


Mel gets to her feet and takes Janice by the arm, tilting her head several times in a beckoning manner to get her up.

She glances down at Thomas and smiles as she yanks Janice from her seat.


(takes Janice by the hand - looks at Thomas)

Excuse us for just a little minute...


She pulls her several feet away from the table, smiling sheepishly at Thomas as she does.

Clive Thomas is a bit confused as they leave, but says nothing.



Whatís wrong with you!? Theyíll lock us up and throw away the key!


(glancing over at Thomas, waves, continues to talk)

Now, just hold on, Janice, honey... Think back for just a minute here. Remember the scrolls we found in Ireland mentioned something about an island...


A moment of silence falls between them. They both glance toward Thomas. Mel smiles and waves. Janice pokes her.

Mel turns her attention back to Janice.


(a little confused)

Yeah? So?


(whispering excitedly)

One of the scrolls we found in Aresís tomb also mentioned something about an island... and the strange effects the water had on Xena!


(eyeing Thomas)

So youíre saying...


(smiles - waves at Thomas again)

Iím sayiní that for the U.S. State Department and British Intelligence to go through all this trouble to get us to authenticate a couple of scrolls... And Mister Thomasí admission that this is a mattah of national security...


Mel glances at Thomas again, smiles and waves.

Janice does likewise, a look of confusion still etched on her face.

Then suddenly she turns to Mel.


(eyes brightening)

Itís not just any old scroll thatís missing... itís a scroll that has a map to...


(finishes Janiceís thought)

The Fountain of Youth!


Aní moreín likely... the Naziís are after it!


Janice nods, and turns to Thomas, who is watching both women with interest and suspicion.



Weíve got to get our hands on that map!



Aní find it before any of them do!





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