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written for The Xena Warrior Princess Virtual Season is a work of fiction based upon the television series Xena: Warrior Princess.

The original characters are used strictly for fan purposes and not for profit.

There is no intent to infringe upon or violate any copyrights held by Studio USA, Renaissance Pictures, Universal Television or any other organization that owns the rights to this series.


The script, story ideas, and any characters created by the authors that are not part of the original series are copyrighted and remain the sole property of those authors. Also, any original artworks are copyrighted and remain the sole property of those artists. Permission to use any of the written or drawn works herein must be submitted to the original author(s) and artist(s).

 

 


Xena: Warrior Princess Virtual Season

Episode 713: Maids, Mazes and Minotaurs

Written by: Andreya

Illustrated by: Slash


TEASER

1.INT. TAVERN IN ALOPECE NEAR ATHENS - DAY

In a tavern, a thug slouches over the bar swilling ale and bragging how rich he is going to be in a few days time. The warrior woman sitting next to him shoves away the wine cup she is holding and heads quickly for the door.

BARKEEP

Bit loose with your information weren’t you?

 

The thug looks slightly bleary-eyed. He belches. Twice.

 

THUG

Whaddya mean?

 

The barkeep glances at the door then back at the thug.

 

BARKEEP

Telling her what you been up to!

 

THUG

Her!……Who’s her!?………

 

The thug glances at the door and then back at the barkeep.

 

THUG

Ah, you mean her!……oh, she’s nobody!

 

BARKEEP

Nobody!……nobody!

 

He leans forward conspiratorially and whispers.

 

BARKEEP

You been living abroad or something? That was the Warrior Princess!

The thug looks bemused, then enlightened, then horrified. He jumps up, scattering everything on the bar.

 

THUG

XENA!

He bolts for the door muttering that he knew Amphipolis was a mistake. The barkeep shakes his head and grins.

 

CUT TO:

 

2. EXT. CAMPSITE OUTSIDE OF A TOWN CLOSE TO ATHENS - DAY

Dust and cooking utensils fly in all directions as Argo skids to a halt smack in the middle of the camp and Xena throws herself from the saddle. Gabrielle is about to verbally flay Xena alive when she catches the look on her friend’s face.

GABRIELLE

Xena! What’s wrong?

 

Gabrielle retrieves their best frying pan from a bush.

 

XENA

Gabrielle, get the gear together quick, we gotta go, I’ll explain later.

 

GABRIELLE

But I’ve only just set everything out!

 

But Xena has already gone to cool Argo off after their mad dash from town. Rolling her eyes skywards and flinging her hands in the air Gabrielle heaves a deep sigh and begins to gather their scattered belongings, packing them all away again and loading them on to the back of the horse that stands patiently nearby.

 

GABRIELLE
(To the horse)

Sorry about this but you know what she’s like.

CUT TO:

 

3. EXT. ON THE ROAD - DAY

Xena urges Argo into a fast canter. Gabrielle’s grip on the lead rope tightens, her other hand readjusting around the warrior’s waist.

XENA

Back in town I overheard a conversation between a barkeep and a customer……

 

Gabrielle snorts.

GABRIELLE

Ha! in a tavern eavesdropping again; that’s how you find out about all the villages that need saving.

 

XENA

…will you let me finish?

 

GABRIELLE

Sorry!

 

XENA

Thank you. As I was saying, in town……

 

Gabrielle’s head wags from side to side.

 

GABRIELLE

Yeah, yeah, I got that bit, get on with it.

 

Xena half turns in the saddle, aims an elbow that was meant for her friend’s ribs but the aim goes a little high.

 

GABRIELLE

Ow!

 

Gabrielle winces.

 

GABRIELLE

Did you have to do that?

 

Xena smirks a smirk that her friend does not see.

 

XENA

Now maybe you’ll let me finish.

 

GABRIELLE

Sorry. Go on. What did you overhear that was so important that we had to scramble before even having a bite to eat?

 

XENA

Word has it that the latest lot of people have been rounded up and taken to Knossus for sacrifice to the Minotaur……

 

GABRIELLE

I heard that story back in Potedeia. King Minos of Crete asked Poseidon for a bull so that he could sacrifice it back to him. Poseidon gave Minos a magnificent white bull. However, Minos went back on his word and didn’t sacrifice the bull to Poseidon. Poseidon was furious and as punishment caused Minos’s wife to lust after the bull.

 

Xena’s nods as Gabrielle continues.

 

GABRIELLE

She became pregnant and the result was the Minotaur, and Minos keeps it underground in the labyrinth. It’s said that every 9 years 7 men and 7 women are ‘selected’ to be taken to Knossus for sacrifice to the Minotaur. Such a sad story don’t you think?

XENA

It’s no story Gabrielle. The last time it happened I was still a warlord and I didn’t care about other people’s problems. But this time there’s a difference. This time two of the people were from Amphipolis……

 

GABRIELLE

But the story says the people are always from Athens.

 

XENA

Well it seems the Athenians are far from happy with being the chosen ones and are looking further afield. These are two people I know from our last visit to Amphipolis during Solstice. And I mean to get them back.

 

Gabrielle laughs.

 

GABRIELLE

Look out Minotaur, here we come!

 

Suddenly Argo balks. Xena is immediately on the alert. As they round a corner they see a half dozen roughs standing in the middle of the road. Xena stops her horse and reaches behind to help Gabrielle to the ground, never taking her eyes from the group in front.

 

XENA

Afternoon boys, how can we help ya?

 

The thugs charge. Xena flips off Argo………

 

XENA

Aiyiyiyiyiyiyiyiii!

…and lands nimbly between her horse and the thugs, sword drawn, and smiling.

 

XENA

Come and get it!

 

Xena backhands the first thug with one fist and a second with the other. Both end up on their butts. The others hesitate.

 

THUG LEADER
(Yells)

Whatsthematter!! Don’t stop! What’s one and a half against six?!

 

The thugs attack again. An insulted Gabrielle joins in. Xena whacks another two whilst Gabrielle quickly despatches two more. The last two make a dive for cover. Gabrielle, her blood up goes after one as Xena pounces on the leader.

 

XENA

Oh no you don’t……

 

Xena puts the pinch on him and calls to Gabrielle.

 

XENA

Let him go. I got the one I want. He’s the one I saw in the tavern……

 

She turns back to her captive.

 

XENA
(glaring down at thug)

I've just cut off the flow of blood to your brain. You’ll be dead in 30 seconds unless you tell me what I want to know. What are you up to? Talk, now or suffer the consequences!

 

THUG LEADER
(Gasping and gurgling)

Please! Stop! I’m sorry……aaghhhh…

 

XENA

Why are you following us?

 

THUG LEADER

I had to stop you. You can’t stop the sacrifices, I won’t get paid if you do!

 

XENA

What about these others?

 

THUG LEADER
(Gasping)

Only here for the ride…

(beat)

Okay, Okay, They’re in it too. Stop now, please!

 

Xena releases him from the pinch and fists him in the face.

 

GABRIELLE

Oh-Oh!

 

XENA

Whaaat!!

 

GABRIELLE

Now he can’t tell us if there are any others!

FADE OUT.

END TEASER

 

ACT I

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